By their fruit you will recognise them.
I am blessed with an amazing community of people around me, but it hasn’t always been that way for me. In the past, I’ve struggled to figure out who I could trust, and I've noticed that some relationships seemed promising at first but ultimately caused more harm than good in my life.
Sometimes it is difficult to gauge at the start whether the influence of a specific person in our life is good or not. However, when you examine the effects of the relationship over a more extended period, such as a year, it becomes easier to discern.
Today, I would like to leave you with this question to ask yourself: Who had a significant impact on how I think, feel, or act over the past year? What was that impact?
You can apply this question to almost anyone: friends, colleagues, bosses, pastors and even the person you’re dating. You want to focus on the fruits that the relationship has cultivated in your life. Are those good or bad?
The Bible teaches us that:
By their fruit you will recognise them. […] Likewise, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. – Matthew 7:16-18
Does every hangout with your friend end up in a gossip session? Do you leave church each Sunday beaten down with guilt and fear? Do you feel safe and respected in the company of your crush?
When you think of a person, ask yourself, “Did their influence cause me to grow closer to God or did it draw me further away from Him?”
If the answers to the above questions are primarily negative, it may be time to consider changing or even ending the relationship. 🤔 Because remember:
Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm. – Proverbs 13:20 NIV
A good friend does the following:
- Lifts you up when you fall (Ecclesiastes 4:9-10)
- Encourages you (1 Thessalonians 5:11)
- Sharpens you (Proverbs 27:17)
- Hears you without judgment and prays for you (James 5:16)
- Joins you in both rejoicing and mourning (Romans 12:15)
Take your time to contemplate this and ask the Holy Spirit to give you insight.
